Category Archives: Important Life Stories

George

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Before Bromont, we lived with a dog we called George. I say we lived with him because I don’t really think you own animals, I think they choose to live with you. You might not agree with me on that, it was really the case with George because he didn’t really need us for all that much. He was a free spirit.

George was what people call a once in a lifetime dog. I love Bromont to death, as I do all the pets, but George was super special. He was the smartest dog in the world.

George happened into my life one day when we were playing ice hockey over at Lake Shawnee in the winter. He was a super small puppy and tumbled onto the ice from the shore. He could barely run, but wouldn’t stop chasing the puck across the ice. He was fearless. We went over to the Park keepers house to see if it was their dog and the daughter said that no, there was a whole litter of puppies left there and they had been taken to the humane shelter. George must of escaped I guess.

Anyway, we took him home and that was it. He was wonderful. I could write stories here all day about him. The dog could remember every place he’d ever been in his life, even if he was there only once, years earlier.

He eventually got into the hearts of nearly everyone in the neighborhood. We didn’t have a fenced yard and George just wandered free. He started walking in the morning with a group of woman that got together every morning and did a long speed walk. There was an early group of women and then a later. He did both walks, so I never saw him much in the morning, he was busy.

At Christmas time, we would get tons of gifts left on the porch for George. Tons of dog treats, toys, one year a bottle of doggie champagne. George would get more Christmas cards than us.

One time when we were gone, Kris let George out at night. A storm rolled in and Kris went out to look for him. It was a big storm and Kris couldn’t find him. Then next morning, the phone rang and it was a person from the nursing home that my grandmother was staying at. She said there was a dog outside howling and a woman there said it was Mrs.Tilford’s grandson’s dog.

So Kris drove over there. It was 3 miles away and George had only been there once. When Kris pulled up, there was George, sitting underneath my grandmother’s window. He’d been there all night. At that time, we’d only taken him to the nursing home once before and that was from a different direction, not directly from our house. When Kris went in to talk to the nurses, a woman came up, all shaking and flustered and said she’d been telling the nurses all night that the dog was ours and they thought she was crazy. George spent a lot of time after that at the nursing home. The people there, most I’d never heard speak a word, would open up and talk about their dogs through their lifetimes and you could see on their faces how happy that the memory made them.

George was super fit too. He would run and run. He was nearly Forest Gump. He just loved to run. Honestly, he would run probably close to 20 miles a day, never less than 10. He would run whatever speed we went. If we were on our bikes, that was the speed. If we were roller blading or running, slower. He loved it.

When George was around 9, he got cancer. He had a lump on his chest that we had removed. Then another one came back in his mouth and we took him to the K-State vet hospital. I was waiting there and they announce my name over the loudspeaker. A guy working there, Ken Harkin, heard my name. He had went to vet school in Ames Iowa, where I spent a ton of time when I road for the Levis Team. He rode bikes and remembered me. Ken came out and introduced himself and took over George’s case.

Ken said that they would remove the tumor from George’s mouth, but it wasn’t good. He had tumors in his lungs and that the prognosis was bleak. We were devastated. A couple weeks later, Ken called me and said he’d been searching around and that there was an experimental study going on in Denver that might help George.

We called the lady there and got George enrolled. It was a gene therapy study that cost $1000 and we had to drive George out to Denver for one day a week for 10 weeks. It’s about 600 miles. So, we started doing that. Trudi did it the first couple times, then me. Finally we were both gone and Kris was driving him. He stopped to walk George and he wasn’t doing too good. He was coughing up bloodly stuff and was dazed. By the time George got to Denver, he could hardly walk. The woman that ran the study said that George had pneumonia and it was going to be super expensive to treat and that he would be kicked out of the study. Kris called and asked me what to do and I told him to drive him back to K-State. Kris drove over 100 mph and got back to Manhattan in 5 hours.

By the time he got there, George was better. The lack of oxygen in Denver wasn’t good for a small lung capacity. Ken said they would put him into a oxygen tent, give him antibiotics to fight the infection and that he would have to stay there a few days at least. Ken called a couple days later and said George could come home. But, it was better than that. They had taken a chest x-ray and all the tumors in George’s lung were gone. It was close to a miracle. It was so weird that George got kicked out of a study and they never knew that it “cured” him. I think he said that the stuff that George was coughing out of his mouth might of been dead tumors, but I might be wrong on that.

George was great for a long while. The cancer came back about 3 years later. He was 13 by then and gray. He slowed down, but never stopped running. We’d let him out of the car a block or two from our house and he would take off like he was a puppy, only going 1/10 the speed.

Finally, one Friday, I decided it was enough. George could barely walk and it seemed it was the right time. Kris begged me to wait until the weekend was over, that we’d have someone come over on Monday to put him to sleep. I agreed because I hated the thought. Anyway, George went downhill badly. By Sunday evening, there was something in his throat that had grown and he was gasping for air. We called every vet in town, left messages and no one was returning our calls. We didn’t have an all night vet hospital in Topeka at the time.

Finally, about 1 in the morning, I realized that no one was going to help. I came to the conclusion that I was going to have to help George out myself. We had an old hunting rifle from my grandfather. He raised hunting dogs and was an avid hunter himself. It was a .22 caliber rifle with a 4-10 shotgun barrel underneath. I think he called it a squirrel gun.

I took George out to the backyard on his favorite blanket. I sat there with him, more upset than I’d ever been in my life. I couldn’t believe that I had gotten to the point when I was going to have to do the most awful thing I could imagine. I would have given anything for the phone to ring and been told a vet was coming to do it. But no. So I just sat there and cried and cried.

Finally, I realized that it was my responsibility. It was strange trying to figure out a way that I could sit with George, with his head in my lap, and hold the gun and get my finger on the trigger. I was so worried about all the blood and also about shooting myself in the leg. George was breathing so badly and labored that it was crazy upsetting. His eyes were pleading with me to help him. Eventually I had figured out everything and said my final goodbye.

It took me forever to pull the trigger. I was so terrified. It was over in a split second. And it was exactly the opposite of what I had imagined. It was total quiet. Nothing. A complete peacefulness. No blood, just a small drop on the top of his head.

I sat there for a while and couldn’t believe how I felt. It was the biggest emotional change I’ve ever experienced. One second I was scared to death about doing something I would do anything to get out of and the next I am at ease with myself, nearly joyful for the moment. I thanked George for letting me experience the moment with him.

It was life changing for me. That experience made my life so much better. It changed the way I think. It’s hard to understand while it is happening how one moment in your life can change the rest of it. I would have given anything, and been so relieved, to have the phone ring and been able to avoid the ordeal, but it turned out to be maybe the most important moment of my life. It gave me strength to do tasks that I previously though were not attainable. It gave me pride. I have to give all the credit to George. Life is strange in that way.

We buried George up on the top of a hill where he used to play. It was the dead of summer and very hot. We carried him up there in his blanket. It was 2 or 3 am. I had a shovel, but realized very quickly that it wasn’t enough. The ground was so hard, it was impossible to dig. Trudi went home and got a pick-ax. It was cathartic digging the hole, sweating, getting bit by bugs. I imagined what the settlers did a century and a half ago when a loved one died. I know they didn’t dig very deep holes in the middle of the summer. That is why they covered the graves with rocks, because it is nearly impossible to dig a 6 foot hole that time of the year.

The closest I get to religion is when a pet dies. We sat up there and talked about what a nice place it was for George. I was creating some sort of Indian like spirit scenario where George has the run of the park and his spirit is eternal. I thanked George for being my friend and for helping me get through the whole experience.

I go over and visit George pretty often. I just ride by and say hi. Sometimes I just sit. It always makes me feel better. I wish, with all my soul, his spirit is running free through the fields and woods.

george1063

He wasn't much into shrimp.

He wasn’t much into shrimp.

Bromont Needs Surgery

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The last couple days Bromont has been breathing really badly when he gets hot running. He’s been breathing rather loudly over the whole winter, but he is turning 10 pretty soon, so I thought he was get getting older. But, the last week, it hasn’t been normal. So, I took a video of him breathing after walking and sent it off to Dr. Ken Harkin, the same veterinarian that took such good care of George. Ken emailed me back instantly and said that we should bring him in as soon as possible.

Even though Trudi only got back from The Tour of California late Monday, she got into the car and drove him over to Manhattan to see Ken. The surgeon looked at him and said that he most likely has laryngeal paralysis, but maybe laryngeal neoplasia. He needs his larynx to be scoped to see exactly what the issue is. Either way, he needs surgery to help alleviate some of the problem. He has to be at the Vet School for 4 days. She decided to bring him home and do the surgery next week. She has to go to Chattanooga for National Professional Road Championships this weekend, while I’m taking Bromont up to Quad Cities with me. She wanted to be around when he got released, which makes sense.

It has to be done. He can’t run or be in heat until it gets fixed.

Yesterday wasn’t that great a day for me. I felt okay, just though, riding on Monday. We did 2 couple hours at a pretty good clip the last 30 minutes. But, yesterday I was beat. I think it is allergies, but maybe it isn’t. I was allergic to 17 out of 45 things I was exposed to last Friday at the doctor’s office and most of those are extremely high in Kansas right now.

Anyway, yesterday it was pretty windy from the West. So I decided to ride the Landon Bike Trail out Southeast to stay sheltered some. It is an old rail trail that isn’t close to complete, pretty primitive in places. Anyway, the thunderstorms had blown a bunch of trees over the trail. I had to dismount and walk over two or three. I was heading out towards Berryton, wearing headphones listening to Pandora, when all of a sudden I’m falling off the back of my bike. A tree branch had gotten blown out of a tree and fell on me right when I was under it. It hit me right in the face. I must of just released my bars, because I just fell off the back of my bike and landed on my side/ass. I had no idea what happened for a second. I reached up and my glasses were gone and I felt a bump on my forehead. Then I saw the branch. It wasn’t that big, maybe 2 or 3 inches in diameter and 10 feet long.

I sat there for a little bit, did a little systems check and got going. Man, what are the changes of that happening? I remember Tejay getting hit by a limb or something last season in a stage race and I thought that was really odd too. So, that was the highlight of the ride. I got worse and worse all ride. My surgery shoulder started aching after an hour, so I just turned back and crawled home. It was the worst ride I’ve had this year. 16 mph average for 2 hours. Now my shoulder is aching more. I told my doctor, Stacie, that I never fall out training and now I’ve fallen twice in two weeks. Neither time it should have happened. Weird season so far.

We walked Bromont over to the Dairy Queen last night at 10 pm. He can walk on a leash, but not run free. It’s a couple miles each way. Bromont loves DQ vanilla cones. It’s his favorite treat. I eat the first half,maybe more, and he gets the whole cone full of ice cream. My legs were pretty done when I got back. I’ve been very on and off the last few days.
Pretty frustrating, but it is what it is.

I have to put a road bike together. I raced my Eriksen cross bike last weekend in Arkansas. My arm is working so badly, it takes a pretty long time to do the mechanical work. But, I need to do it. I guess that is the project for this afternoon. It is only mid-May, so it’s about time.

Bromont’s Breathing Problem from Steve Tilford on Vimeo.

The video I sent to Ken.

Trudi and Bromont at the airport Monday night.

Trudi and Bromont at the airport Monday night.

One of the trees down on the trail.  I guess it was fortuitous that I didn't get smashed by this one.

One of the trees down on the trail. I guess it was fortuitous that I didn’t get smashed by this one.

Face photo when I got home.

Face photo when I got home.

You know it's a shitty ride when your jersey pockets look like this when you get home.  Changing tubes is a real challenge with my right shoulder.

You know it’s a shitty ride when your jersey pockets look like this when you get home. Changing tubes is a real challenge with my right shoulder.

I Screwed Up – Severed a Tendon

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2013 hasn’t been my year. At least so far. It started out pretty well, for a couple weeks, and then it just went haywire. Yesterday I was using a chainsaw and it went bad. It could have went a lot worse, so that is the up side. But, it went bad enough that I spent the afternoon in the emergency room

It all started out nice and normal. I drove over to physical therapy for my shoulder, only to find out that I wasn’t scheduled. So, I got some coffee and decided to go for a long ride. Somewhere getting ready to ride, I thought that I would just do the 6 o’clock ride at my house and go over to this property I own and cut some trees along a fence line that the city has red flagged. So, I hooked up a trailer, filled it with the necessary tools, including a chainsaw, and drove over there.

Trudi thought that we could just use pruning loppers, but I knew better. Most of these trees, were a couple inches around and my shoulder would be valueless in that scenario. Anyway, I started cutting the saplings. Just a couple of minutes into the job, the day took a bad turn. I was cutting one and didn’t want it to fall towards me, pinching the saw chain, so I was using my right hand on the saw and holding the tree with my left. It was only 8 feet tall or so. Anyway, I cut through the tree and it didn’t fall because it was held up by a vine. I was holding the tree with my left arm and put the saw on the ground, but right then, the vine broke and all the weight of the tree was in my left hand and it went down into the saw, with the chain still moving, the brake wasn’t on.

My left knuckle went into the chain and that was it. In that match up, skin tissue vs. chainsaw, tissue always lose. I had gloves on, but gloves lose too. I pulled my hand back pretty quickly, but the damage, some damage, was done. I could see my tendons and knuckle bone before the blood started pouring out. It wasn’t good.

I calmly told Trudi that I was hurt and she sort of panic-ed, but not horribly. I wrapped my hand up in a Gatorade towel I got at Cross Nationals in Madison and drove home. I looked at the wound again and realized it was out of my league in trying to do a home repair. So, I headed down to the hospital.

The doctor came in and irrigated the wound pretty good and did a couple of strength tests. She said that I just needed some sutures, which was a relief. Then she said I was going to have to take a bunch of antibiotics, since it was a “farm injury”. I wasn’t big on that at all, since I don’t do well with antibiotics, athletically. I figured I could just get the prescription and then decide about eating them later.

Then the day got worse. When she was looking closely at the wound, she realized that the tendon was severed. She said it so nonchalant that it didn’t seem like a big deal. But, I was soon to learn that wasn’t the case.

I called my friend Stacie, in Louisville, who is over-seeing my shoulder healing deal now, and talked to her some. Stacie then talked to the doctor at the ER room. It seems there is a shortage of hand surgeons in Topeka and that I need to go to Kansas City to have surgery. I guess they need to do the surgery within 7 days, or the chances of the finger working correctly is much less.

The short of it is that I need to get the tendon put back together and it is anywhere from 4 to 8 weeks of non-use to allow it to heal. WTF? I’ve had a lot of non-use, downtime already this year and can hardly comprehend 2 months more. I’m in a little bit of denial right now, thinking that this all might work out. My finger sort of seems to work some, so I don’t really see how the tendon can be completely severed. If that was the case, then the finger shouldn’t work at all.

So, on Wednesday, I am going to Kansas City to see a hand surgeon, and they are going to open up the wound to check out the situation. And I’m hoping that I am going to have some choices at that point. But, right now it seems like they are going to have to fix it and then immobilize my finger/hand/wrist for a while.

I hate to say it, but maybe, just maybe I was starting to finally feel like I had some form. I know my results from last weekend didn’t reflect it, but I went out and rode 20 miles on the evening ride, after the whole deal at the ER, and felt a ton better than I have in weeks. Plus, when I got home I did situps, 75 straight, without straining the least bit. That is sort of a test I do. If I can do over 50 situps with ease, then my riding usually starts going good. I know it sounds screwy, but it is always the case.

Okay, the day could have been worse. I could have cut my finger off completely. Or my hand, so that is the upside. But, shit, this wasn’t what I needed just right now. My right arm is working so pitifully, I’ve become pretty reliant on my left arm. I’m nearly ambidextrous at this point. Now, I’m back at square one it seems. I can’t put on my socks, or reach into my jersey pocket or a million other common things.

I know I shouldn’t mess around much with this. My finger and using it is much more important than a few bike races. I had a huge antibiotic injection into my butt and am eating more for the next week. So, I assume I’m going to be riding like hell pretty soon. Not that I was riding much better before. Maybe I’d better be shopping for a new pair of hiking boots for this summer. It looks right now like bike racing might be just wishful thinking for a while.

Trying to get a good look at the wound was an issue with all the blood.

Trying to get a good look at the wound was an issue with all the blood.

After repair, it started swelling up pretty big.

After repair, it started swelling up pretty big.

It's such a little baby saw, but it packs a big bite.

It’s such a little baby saw, but it packs a big bite.

I turned around after 12 miles riding because my hand started throbbing to my heart beat.

I turned around after 12 miles riding because my hand started throbbing to my heart beat.

So, I rode over to PT's/The Flying Monkey and drank some beer.

So, I rode over to PT’s/The Flying Monkey and drank some beer.

It was nice that the Blackhawks won the Stanley Cup though.  Pretty crazy finish, with 2 goals in 17 seconds at then end.

It was nice that the Blackhawks won the Stanley Cup though. Pretty crazy finish, with 2 goals in 17 seconds at then end.

Dale Stetina Seriously Injured

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I received an email a little while ago telling of a horrible accident that my friend, Dale Stetina had. Dale is the father of Garmin rider, Peter Stetina, and brother of Wayne Stetina, Shimano guy. Dale crashed while descending a canyon outside of Boulder and is in serious condition at a Boulder hospital. I contacted Wayne and he is flying out tomorrow morning to stay. Anyway, I know a bunch of you that read this are friends and acquaintances of Dale’s. I hope only the best for Dale and a speedy recovery. Email below.


Friend of Dale,

I am so sorry to be delivering you this email, but Dale’s wife Anne asked me to reach out to his good friends and fellow cyclists. Today as we descended from Ward in Left Hand Canyon, Dale was involved in a serious bicycle accident that was caused by a vehicle pulling onto the road as he descended towards it.

Dale did not hit the car, but hit the pavement, landing face first, suffering significant facial and ocular damage, and loss of responsiveness. EMTs were on the scene rapidly, he received good care. He was flown to Boulder Community Hospital in a Flight for Life helicopter. He is there now in ICU.

The CatScan diagnosis revealed Brain Stem injuries. The neurosurgeon describes the injuries as very serious. Dale is in tough shape. The future of Dale’s recovery is not known at this time, the doctors have offered no predictions. His vital signs are stable given the trauma he encountered. We are all hopeful.

Dale on the cover of Velonews after winning the Coor's Classic in 1983.

Dale on the cover of Velonews after winning the Coor’s Classic in 1983.

Dale and Wayne Stetina at the Pro Challenge a couple years ago.

Dale and Wayne Stetina at the Pro Challenge a couple years ago.

Dale, 2nd for the front, at the Nevada City Criterium.  I'm out of the picture, obscured, but my team mate Andy Hampsten is there along with Chris Carmichael and a few others.
Dale, 2nd for the front, at the Nevada City Criterium. I’m obscured, but my team mate Andy Hampsten is there along with Alexi Grewal, Chris Carmichael and a few others guys I know.

Crash scene.

Crash scene.

Dale Stetina Update

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Hi. By the hits here, a lot of people are very interested in how Dale Stetina is doing. I went out for a long-ish MTB ride here in Steamboat, out of cell range, and when I got back my phone and email was slammed with encouraging messages and calls from newspapers, tv and radio stations, asking about Dale. I’ve been in contact with Wayne Stetina pretty much all day and he has been handling most of the media stuff. Wayne is very good at compartmentalizing things in times of craziness it seems. He just sent me a link to a twitter account that will be doing updates often. This will be the best way for the family to give out current information that they feel is appropriate. Click here for the link to Dale’s twitter account. Wishing the best for all involved.

wayne

Dale at the '77 National Road Champhionships.

Dale at the ’77 National Road Champhionships.

Surgery on Thursday

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This isn’t 100% for sure, but probably. If all goes as scheduled, I’m going to see the doctor on Wednesday and then have my thumb fixed on Thursday. It’s not something that I’m looking forward to. I’ve been sort of in denial, but that isn’t something that behooves a good outcome for this. I guess a thumb injury has a much higher chance of success the quicker it gets repaired. I think that the injury builds up scaring and that is harder to reattach than fresh, acute injury. I have a hard time believing that my thumb injury is acute, but that is what the MRI says, I guess. Maybe if anyone can understand the mumbo-jumbo below, let me know what you think.

We didn’t get to ride much yesterday. Spent most of the day doing core work. Lifting and moving wood. We had an all day, all night, all day fire going. Dennis had a lot of old wood laying around. Downed trees, un-splittable knots, etc. There is something about the smell of a wood fire close to fall. We all sat out there most of the night and just sat.

Today I think we are going up to Bayfield County up by Lake Superior. I’m not sure exactly what we are doing there. Picking some apples for sure. Maybe sea kayaking or canoeing in Lake Superior? The Porcupine Mountains? I’m not exactly sure. Any ideas? Seems like a good idea to take my mind off of more serious things.

I thought Sven Nys was going to win last night. I wasn’t sure he was going to smear everyone like he did. I guess he’s just that much better. He’s won both the races he’s done this year in the US, Cross Vegas and the World Championships. I think he came over here quite a while ago and raced in the Northwest, but I’m not positive about that. He was doing some of those after the Tour de France start $$$ races, so he had some form. And the course in Las Vegas doesn’t even suit his incredible technical skills.

Okay, I think I’ll go ride some. It is in the 60’s and muggy here. There is a cold front moving through, so the temperature is going to drop like a rock later.

Click to enlarge.

Click to enlarge.

The fire was pretty hot.

The fire was pretty hot.

This is a bottle that was in the coals for about 3 minutes.

This is a bottle that was in the coals for about 3 minutes.

Trudi was making s'mores.

Trudi was making s’mores.

We did a neighborhood tour and Hawkeye was hot.

We did a neighborhood tour and Hawkeye was hot.

I fell on a slick root riding down to swim in the lake.  Obviously my chainring caught my calf.  I have this exact "tatoo" under my hair by getting ran over in a Gant Challenge race back in the 80's.

I fell on a slick root riding down to swim in the lake. Obviously my chainring caught my calf. I have this exact “tatoo” under my hair by getting ran over in a Gant Challenge race back in the 80’s.

This is my friend George's secret hid away out in the woods.  It's underground.  He sneaks off in the middle of the afternoon to take naps and get some alone time from his kids.

This is my friend George’s secret hid away out in the woods. It’s underground. He sneaks off in the middle of the afternoon to take naps and get some alone time from his kids.

Heading Home

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I”m not doing surgery on my thumb today. It’s sort of a relief. I wasn’t looking much forward to being out of commission for two months. It’s not that great though. The catch is that my thumb is too jacked up for the surgeon to repair. He said that he wasn’t sure that if he did the procedure that it would give me much relief or make the function of the thumb any better. That was enough for me. So, my thumb is just going to be gimpy for the foreseeable future. I’m hoping that it will heal up some on it’s own and gets a little more stable and less painful. I’m not so sure that cyclocross is the best thing for it, but I need a couple days to think it through.

It wasn’t a waste of time coming here. The guys at the Kleinert Kutz Hand Center are some of the best in the business and I can rest assured that I had very good information to make this important decision. It is amazing how complicated a hand is and that it needs its own offshoot of orthopedic surgeons to work specifically on it. I went by for a shoulder evaluation from Stacie’s PT guy, Jeromy. He suggested that I get a electrodiagnostic nerve test to figure out why a big portion of my shoulder muscle isn’t firing. My guy, Burt, has suggested this previously, so maybe it is a good idea. Just another thing.

So, back to Topeka. I still have a ton of stuff to do and need to put together a few bikes, so my thumb being in the mix will facilitate that immensely. It’s 10 hours back and it’s already a little late, so I should get moving.

I really have to thank my friends Stacie and Karl for putting us up the last couple days. Stacie has the energy of 3 people. It is amazing and sort of depressing at the same time when I think of how little energy I have in comparison. I hope to come back out to Lousiville for the UCI races here in early November, so I’ll see these guys again soon hopefully.

Trudi, Stacie and her son Adam sorting through "a few" legos for Adam's birthday party this weekend.

Trudi, Stacie and her son Adam sorting through “a few” legos for Adam’s birthday party this weekend.

My iPhone was messed up and I went to the Apple Store here and they gave me a new phone.  This guy was set up in the mall to fix broken screens etc.  Pretty great idea.

My iPhone was messed up and I went to the Apple Store here and they gave me a new phone. This guy was set up in the mall to fix broken screens etc. Pretty great idea.

I went for a couple hour ride with Curtis Tolson.  We rode by his daughter's cross country practice.

I went for a couple hour ride with Curtis Tolson. We rode by his daughter’s cross country practice.

We went to dinner last night on Frankfort Street.  It is eclectic and fun.

We went to dinner last night on Frankfort Street. It is eclectic and fun.

Karl has some pretty awesome tools downstairs.  This is a portable drill press with an electro magnet base.

Karl has some pretty awesome tools downstairs. This is a portable drill press with an electro magnet base.