Dick Doper Threatened with Potential Jail Time

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I saw an article over at Velonews about a guy in LA, Nicholas Brandt-Sorensen, that was charged with selling EPO through the mail.  Nick pleaded to selling ONE vial of EPO to someone in Colorado.  He was also selling Actovegin, a derivative of calf’s blood on his website.

Okay, obviously, the dude is a dick. He served a 2 year ban for testing positive at Master’s Nationals a few years ago.  But that obviously didn’t slow him down.  He decided to profit from it by becoming a drug dealer.

As usual, Seth at Cycling in the South Bay beat me to the punch yesterday.  Click here to see Seth’s always amusing take on it.  

Turns out that Nick owns a clothing company (No reason to click that link since you shouldn’t buy anything from a guy pushing drugs to athletes. I just looked, too many of you are clicking the link, don’t do it.) for custom clothing in LA.  I remember doing the Nosco ride a couple years ago and a kid that was riding in his clothing was hauling ass up the climbs.

The funny thing is the guy goes by the name Thorfinn Sassquatch on Strava.  No shit, he does. How hilarious is that.   I went to his Strava profile and it seems he cherry-picks Strava KOM’s all over LA.  Cycling and running.  Under his name is this –

www.instagram.com/thorfinnsassquatch Olympic ITP & WADA Bio Passport Program >36 months. Top most randomly no-notice bio sampled cyclist in USA 2013-14 with 24/7 whereabouts filing for >36 months. (Required UCIWT or Olympic brand events)

I have no idea what that means and if it is a promotional deal, bragging, or just fuckin’ stupid, since he already sat out 2 years for cheating a bunch of Master’s in Bend.

What a douche.  He does have 1600 followers on Strava.  If any of you are following him, maybe just unfollow him now.  He doesn’t deserve anyone’s attention in my opinion.  Nothing like doping and selling doping products, while setting Strava KOM’s.

I wonder if the deal he made is like Joe Papp and that all his customers are sweating now, worried about the Fed’s knocking on their door for buying doping products through the mail?  I surely hope so.  And I hope the guy has to spend a timeout in jail.  Maybe not a year, but enough to scare some sense into him.

Okay, enough about this guy.  I’m going to try to erase  it out of my memory.  It isn’t worth another though.

I got this photo from Midnight Ridazz Rider Profile. The guy kind of looks like Ron Howard. I guess this jersey photo was before he was suspended for doping.

I got this photo from Midnight Ridazz Rider Profile. The guy kind of looks like Ron Howard. I guess this jersey photo was before he was suspended for doping.  The other photo could be his mug shot?

Tucker looking all cute. I don't even like posting a picture of Tucker even close to the creep above. They are polar opposites.

Tucker looking all cute. I don’t even like posting a picture of Tucker even close to the creep above. They are polar opposites.

35 thoughts on “Dick Doper Threatened with Potential Jail Time

  1. Gabby

    I feel like there are alot of guys that were convicted of doping that are mopping up on the masters circuit now. I think we even have one as a master national champ now.

    1. Kurt MC

      Curious who the colorado athlete is (did it say it was a cyclist?).

      The CA masters are known for rampant doping. The guy who beat every age group by two minutes in the TT a few years ago. Right…

  2. Bolas Azules

    I just shake my head. And these geniuses are shooting calf’s blood into their asses and who knows what else. Then they stand-up (if they can) and wonder in amazement when they get testicular cancer, cancer, strokes at the age of 45, heart attacks at 50, ailments no one has ever heard of AND THEN their offspring are born with whacked-out ailments and cancer.

    Hey old Bolas Azules rode with a granola bar and a banana in the pockets of his wool jersey and you know what? I’m feeling pretty good.

  3. Chris Creed

    Ha! I wondered who Thorfin Sasquatch was and why he was following big old chunky me on Strava.

  4. Bill V.

    His buyers should just do what is easy. Get on whatever replaced Silk Road, get some bitcoins to throw into the seller’s escrow, and place your order. Better yet, get someone you know who is a non-cyclist to do the ordering for you and have it delivered to a PO box. If customs nabs it, you won’t get in trouble anyway because they are more focused on the big sellers than the small time buyers and don’t want to waste their time and money. Sellers are pretty good with their shipping practices so the chances of a package being intercepted is fairly low.

    This guy got caught not through his buying, but because of his selling. He probably could have not dealt this stuff and never been caught at all. Selling these products online across the country is a pretty sloppy practice and in my opinion by doing so you are operating on borrowed time.

  5. channel_zero

    What would the Feds prosecute if they try the customers? They have nothing to fear.

    This guy illustrates one of the problems with doping. The criminal penalties are too light.

    Meanwhile, Al Salazar was shipping PEDs disguised as books internationally. Why wasn’t he tried? Uncle Phil’s hobby a little too big?

    Magness called Salazar, who he says told him to expect a package. Two days later, a box arrived at his hotel room. Inside it he found a paperback thriller. Confused, he flipped it open. A section of the pages had been hollowed out to form a compartment into which two pills were taped.


  6. Will Dolphin

    No time coming. Deal calls for probation, 300 community hours and $5k fine. Meaning he rolled over. No prosecutions likely of customers, but 3 athletes connected to his AnemiaPatients Group reportedly suspended.

  7. Matt M

    Pull the link Steve…WTF? Don’t post it and say “dont’ touch” – we’re all a bunch of 2 year olds who can’t resist teh temptation…so pull the link

    oh yea, he is a douche too!

  8. shano92107

    it just boggles my mind that amateur racers or GrandFondo types will do this to win – what??? If you’re a pro racing against other juiced riders at least you can -maybe- justify it to make a paycheck but these cat2-4 that supposedly do it – just to win a prime in some no name race or a little scratch cash?
    Every race I hear somebody grumbling about the lead group being a bunch of dopers – who cares… I’ll still go get my ass kicked and at the end of the day I’m still glad i got out and took a crack at it. Not gonna let Ron Howard spoil my fun!

  9. Mike Rodose

    The cat 3s, masters and gran fondos on motors/PEDs were formerly called Freds.

    Now they can be called Opies!

  10. steevo

    Papp had a list of close to a hundred right? how many got busted? 10? How many ever came out. Its a bunch of bullshit.

  11. paul

    Pathetic. If there are really 50 year old dudes out there doping what chance to does a 50 year old hack like me have when I’m enjoying 2-3 IPA’s a night as I’m reading this blog?

    The whole Salazar thing is sad. He was my hero when I was a distance runner growing up because of his “win or die trying attitude” but I’ve heard some pretty bad things about him from guys who ran for him.

  12. BZ

    “He doesn’t deserve anyone’s attention in my opinion.”

    I had no idea who he was until I got here.

  13. Chris

    I will say, regardless of his sadly unfortunate, self-destructive doping/distribution background, the clothing is by far the most comfortable there is on the market, and it’s NOT made in China. Ever look at Rapha? Brandt-Sorenson apparel is all custom made for each individual customer’s body dimensions, and nobody else on the market is making cycling clothes this way. The tailored detailing is all done by Nick personally, and the attention to detail is created by the hands of a true artist (he does have an art degree). You can’t scale this up and farm it out to China! My bibs last several seasons and are just as comfortable as when new, yet every one of my team kits by all the popular brands wear out in a few months. You have NO idea how much of a difference these clothes make until you try them, and trust me, it’s worth it. Also, if you support his business, you are supporting a local small business person, and his rehab. If you believe in forgiveness and the possibility that someone can make a mistake and improve their life/turn things around because of it, then you might understand why it is important to support his cause. And, when you buy his clothing, it’s really YOU that is winning.

    Regarding the drug distribution activities, in one way, since he was not racing anymore due to ban/retirement, and he was aware of how many people were still doping and getting away with it (very little testing in amateur and masters racing), he essentially set a big snare and rounded up a shitload of “cheating masters” customers who are surely about to get their turn in the spotlight. Surely, Steve, you can appreciate certain aspects of this story. I don’t know any details, but lenient sanctions generally only come paired with revealed information and cooperation with the investigative agency. The customers generally are well-to-do, and if he did not spill the beans on all of them, that right there is the source of funding to cover your legal fees.

    Lance is doing the same thing. Heard of Thom Weisel?

    And, who is the Boulder customer???

    1. KrakatoaEastofJava

      Glad I went back and looked up your posts “Chris”!

      You want me to help you with your “rehab”?Tell us the entire story of how you set up your sales network. How you sourced the drugs. How did you find your sources? Who helped you with your blood work, etc. Who were your customers? What did coach Brinton think of your miraculous success?

      Start spilling. Tell us the whole story. From the beginning. Tell us everything, not just the minimum required of you.

      1. Chris

        Dear Krakatoa,

        I hate to spoil your fun, but unfortunately you are a little misinformed (and apparently a bit delusional as well). That’s ok. You seem angry and looking for some way to express those feelings. Maybe as an individual, you’ve been wronged by NBS. Who knows. Maybe you are just jumping on the bandwagon and feel a sense of empowerment, being able to attach your thoughts alongside some other people who have gained some media presence and influence. I’m sure it feels good to convince yourself that you are on that team. GO TEAM!

        It is fine that you seem to have convinced yourself that you have somehow been interacting w/ the person you think you are, but I ask, what is that fantasy based upon? It is a little foolish, I hate to say it, but being on the other side of this comment exchange, knowing what I know and knowing what you don’t know, it’s kinda dumb. Do you really think anyone involved with Brandt-Sorenson would actually have the time to participate in this worthless banter? Most likely, business is booming due to the exposure Steve Tilford has so generously provided, not to mention Bob Roll.

        I’m just another happy customer who sees a difference between Brandt-Sorenson, the company, serving myself and numerous other satisfied customers, vs. something else (illegal) that occurred years ago, and which apparently implicated numerous other people (buyers) who were also trying to break the rules. The former is being handled in the appropriate venue, which is the court and anti-doping agencies. The penalty for the 2011 banned substance positive has already been handed down by USADA, and the ban has been served, according to the rules. It is my understanding that he still had to go through random drug tests all through that ban period, plus an additional year. Had there been continued issues, it would have been published in the USADA reports and there would have been a follow up sanction. There was not, based on the public info out there.

        If you think the rules need to change, you should talk to the people who make the rules, not take your frustrations out on those who are currently already facing their serious penalties, not shirking from them.

        Also, you can’t expect to get all the answers you are looking for in an anonymous blog post comment section. That’s just dumb.

        Good luck with whatever is bothering you. I am beyond bored with this particular exchange and am checking out. Later. – Chris

    2. KrakatoaEastofJava

      Lol, “I started selling EPO to help catch other masters assholes.” Good one, “Chris”!

      1. KrakatoaWestofJava

        I just went back and read all of Krakatoa’s posts, and I’m super glad I did, because it made me realize that the commenter posing as Krakatoa might actually not be who they say they are! In fact, upon further investigation, carefully sifting through the words this commenter has used to expose “Chris” as the real “N B-S”, miraculously without using any (ass)umptions, I was inspired to look up wikipedia and it led me to realize that I am both “Chris”, “N B-S”, AND “Krakatoa”, and a fourth yet-to-be created pseudonym, which may indeed be simply “LOL”. This fourth name will be key, because, like the newly rising central island of Krakatou, it will rise from the waters bringing forth such pungency that blog comment readers from near and far will stare at their monitors in awe. By the power of BLOGGER, I cast a nefarious spell upon you, and the earth’s fire will rise up, striking all those who comment further with the ability to also comment with an island name. And the details of this mysterious case will be so credibly divulged within Steve Tilford’s blog comments section.

    3. Lil'KONG

      Nah, his “hand made” stuff is made on the cheap off S. Broadway in downtown LA-LA Land by Mexican illegals. Nick is TOO busy in the hills doing doped Strava KOMs to be manning a sewing machine.

  14. Here we go again

    The heck!?!

    ” If you believe in forgiveness and the possibility that someone can make a mistake and improve their life/turn things around because of it, then you might understand why it is important to support his cause.”

    Let me clarify:
    A mistake is when I throw my road shoes in the car when I’ve loaded up my mountain bike
    A crime is when I premeditatedly procure a drug and sell it to someone else knowing at the time it is illegal.

    Actions would have consequences. The best outcome is he goes out of business and takes a crappy job to pay his legal bills thus serving as an example of what happens when Opie goes bad.

  15. mike crum

    “dont buy anything from a guy pushing drugs to athletes”…. HOPE EVERY PRO CYCLIST THE LAST 50 YEARS HASNT BOUGHT ANYTHING FROM THEIR MANAGER, COACH, DS, ETC…..

  16. Krakatoa

    I’m not sure what this quote means. Could anyone help explain it to me?

    “Opinion is really the lowest form of human knowledge. It requires no accountability, no understanding. The highest form of knowledge is empathy, for it requires us to suspend our egos and live in another’s world. It requires profound purpose larger than the self kind of understanding.” — Bill Bullard

    1. KrakatoaEastofJava

      Chris / NBS: I have no empathy for this stuff anymore. Why don’t you dig deeper into your art school toolbox and use words like “banal”? Or maybe teach us how to do those early 90’s Polaroid transfers? Sorry, they have Photoshop for that now.

      1. JupiterFurtherThanMarsNotUranus

        Just wanted to say that if anyone would like to learn more about Polaroid transfers, it’s actually a very interesting process. You can type “Polaroid transfer” into your Netscape browser after first typing “Google search” and the World Wide Web (WWW) will gather a list of web links which will provide some step-by-step guidelines. This forum is really turning into quite a source for learning and it’s great to be a part of this helpful community. My vocabulary is growing with each comment too! Banal! Banal! Banal! It’s so fun!!! Try it!

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  18. Marko

    Those popped with Paap were busted because they made the mistake of including their real name on the order. Perhaps they have even honed their dope buying skills.

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